All Decked Out

Howdy, friends.  Welcome back to the ‘burb.  I’ve got a really, super duper FUN little ditty for you today.  It’s all about our deck.


Here goes nothing:

So we’ve got this stellar deck

On the back of our house

It’s Trex and lumber and pretty big

And was built by a totally moronic louse.


See, he didn’t use treated lumber.

Or cedar or redwood.

He just screwed those composite planks on pine

And decided to call it good.


The joists, the beams, and the skirting boards

Are now all rotten through.

So we get the pleasure of rebuilding this deck

Oh yeah, and tearing it down, too.


Now you might say “that’s not so bad”

But how about some icing for the cake?

Plywood squares separate cement from wood

And too few case-ons make it quake.


So in swoops the deck guy

To take a good look around.

He exclaims “This is like, WAY unsafe”

“And must be rebuilt from the ground.”


Later came the estimate

And boy, it surely stank

But we want our deck to be usable again

So we’re breaking out our piggy bank.


Mr. Deck Guy is busy

For another few weeks

But the new deck should be completed

Before June starts to peek.


We’re bummed it’s so pricey.

But glad it’ll be fixed

And at least we get to say right now..

Our squishy rotten deck is soon to be nixed.


The End.

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